Nite out w/ the girls and some weird dreams

Scott got done early with the softball tournament. That is if you call leaving home at 5:30am and returning 12 hours later, early. However, it was early enough for me to go out with a couple of friends, one of which is recently single. We had a great time. There was lots of laughing. They were laughing at me because I was chatting up with a lot of different people. Mostly guys for my newly single friend and for the possibility of free drinks. Neither happened, but fun anyway. One of the ladies we met had a beautiful dress that she got at Target. I will need to check that out. Anyway, drank way too much. Those Vodka Collins get me everytime. I got home and went to sleep on the couch. Why, you ask? Because Scott had to get up early this morning to go fishing, and I didn't want to accidently turn off the alarm clock. Yep, he is out again. Why oh why am I so permissive? He said he won't be out too late, but then again 12 hours at a softball tournament is considered early so who knows when he will be home. So back to my hangover. Yes, I haven't had one of those in a long time. I am normally very responsible with my drinking. I usually don't drink much because I have children who need me and my functioning brain. However last night, I drank more than usual because 1. I had a headache that I so desperately wanted to go away (have a worse one now, but gone last night) and 2. just needed to forget my home issues for a while. We went back to my friends house for some late night snacking. She had some White Castles hamburgers. If you ever had White Castles, you know that they only taste good after a nite of drinking. Perfect munchy! With my drinking excursion, came some of the strangest dreams I've had in a while. I can't even explain them as they were so weird, but they involved my friends, my friend's mother, a dried up Christmas tree, a denim jacket, and a strange man's debit card in my pocket. Very weird.

Well my children need breakfast and I need a soda to help ease my tummy. I will post some pictures from the wedding in Dallas and Courtney's first communion soon. Until next time...

And life continues...

Courtney must have sensed my frustration after my last posting because she got her homework done within 30 minutes and after only being told once to do it. Amazing! Last night, the kids and I did a 20 minute "before daddy gets home" cleaning around the house. We jammed out to some music and had fun doing chores. Once again, Amazing! Today the plan is to get the rest of the house including their rooms cleaned. Will we have another incident like the other day???? Who knows, but I am hopeful. Just waiting for the "other shoe to drop".

Scott is playing in a softball tournament today. Sigh! On the bright side, a friend asked me to go out tonight. But, in order for me to go, Scott would have to be home. So here's hoping the team gets done quick. Lose 2 games and be done. I know, I know, pathetic. But, a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do.

Other news: my mom is still at the nursing home. She was suppose to come home today, but she got bronchitis again (a normal occurence w/ emphazemia and COPD). I am not sure when she will be returning. Courtney and I had a tea party with her last week-end. My mom feels bad that she can't do very many things with Courtney so we thought we would bring the fun to her. It was a nice visit.

Not much else is new. Need to get working on this house. UGH! Until next time....

Excuse me, but I would like to exchange my life...

That is how I feel right now. That and exhausted. My throat is soar from yelling at my son to clean his room. My kids' rooms are a mess which is reflective of how I feel. The last 3 week-ends have been extremely busy. This past week-end we were at a wedding. Scott's parents came over to watch the kids while we enjoyed ourselves. Scott's mom once again helped the kids clean their rooms. So their rooms were beautiful on Saturday evening. It didn't take long for them to get right back to their messy state. I get so damn frustrated and aggravated. Why is it that my children who claim to love me respect Grandma more? Why is it when she asks them to put something away, they do it w/out question or hesitation? Why is it that when Scott gets the same reaction that I get, does he say "I don't know what to tell you" when I ask him how to get them to clean up? Why is it that they can clean up the toys they play with at school, at friend's house, basically anywhere but at home? I start out by stating lets get their rooms clean - nicely, in a sweet voice, with a please at the end. I then walk in on them making a bigger mess or watching tv in one of their bedrooms. It gets my blood pumping. I calmly turn off the tv and remind them that I asked them to do something. I get "its too much" from Mason and "how come I have to do everything around here" with a HUGE attitude from Courtney. To say it pisses me off is an understatement. I've had tremendous headaches the last few weeks and I must say it stems from this sense of stress in my household. I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! Just once I wish my family could do one thing that was asked of them the first time. Add to it little to no support from my husband, just adds fuel to the fire. Courtney was saying something about a boy in her class doing better than she and we explained to her that there will always people who do things better than you and those who do things worse than you. Its just a fact of life. Courtney asked Scott what he did better than me. His response: dinner, laundry, housecleaning, sports. She asked what I did better - his response: I can't think of anything. Then chuckled when questioned why he couldn't think of anything. I told him that his comment not only made me look inferior in our children's eyes, but apparently I am inferior in his as well. The response I got - Sorry, I just can't think of anything. He then proceeded to not understand why I was upset! If I am so damn inferior that what the hell is he doing with me? I am sure there is a woman out there who would be a better match for him. I truly think that was the straw that broke me. Its bad enough that I have periods of low self-esteem (I've been dealing with that my whole life), but have someone who you love and so close to you affirm that feeling is just heartbreaking. I know I have good qualities, maybe even great, but that comment just shattered me, and I am not sure how to put the pieces together again. So I guess I will continue with my medioacracy (not sure if I am spelling that correctly, but you get the idea) life where my children don't listen and my husband feels superior. The worse part about all of this is that I know people have bigger issues on their plate. A dear friend who I was reunited with recently had been going through difficult times and I deeply felt for her. I wanted so badly to take her pain away. But, being the amazing person that she is, she fought her own battle and is still fighting, but she is making her way out. I know that my issues are small in comparison, but in this household of ours, it is pouring out the seams.

Need to pick up my daughter at the bus stop. Until next time...

I'm a leavin' on a jet plane.....

Tomorrow I am headed off to Dallas with my three lovely children and my 82 year-old father. Oh, such fun!!! I would say I need to drink but how would I be able to put those air thingys over my childrens' and father's faces if the cabin pressure fell?????

The trip should be fun. As many of you know, my nephew is getting married and my daughters are the flower girls. Mason is my date since my husband is unable to join us. I think he just says he can't because of work just to get out of things.

Like I said the trip should be fun, but these past few days leading up to this, well... not so much. Let see, our budget is getting tighter and tighter to the point we may have to live off Mac N Cheese for a week or two. I played the lotto so keep your fingers crossed! Yesterday, I had to run around like a maniac trying to locate a Fed Ex center that was open late enough so I could get a package to Massachussetts today. Then today when I am trying to get the clothes we are taking with us clean, the heating coil in my dryer went out. So I trucked a couple of loads of laundry and a basket full of wet clothes to my in-laws so we could have clean underwear in Texas. I am sure everyone on the plane will appreciate our efforts!

I have packed my bible for those moments that are too stressful. Its funny. I went to a catholic school all of my life and I have never read the bible. To be honest, I am not sure I was required to read it in any of my religion classes. Anyway, I was looking for something to calm me as I was waking up in the middle of the night with some serious panic attacks. One of my friends mentioned reading the bible and then I saw all those people on Big Brother reading it so I figured I'd give it a shot. Now, there are stories that I don't understand and way to many names to remember in Genesis (gees, those men lived to be in their 900s and continued to have kids. Talk about generation gaps!) However, I do find it relaxing and I don't have nearly as many panic attacks. My sister-in-law and oldest brother will probably be shocked and proud that I am reading the bible. Very devout catholics.

Well, I need to get a few more little things done and then I am off to bed. Until next time....

Not so much to say and so much time to say it

Good gravy, my life is a bit boring lately. I think the most exciting thing that has happened in the last few weeks is that we got some "new to us" furniture. Some friends of my in-laws are moving back to England so they were getting rid of a lot of their furniture. We got a beautiful solid wood kitchen table with 6 chairs, a full size bed, and a white wicker nightstand.

The bed and nightstand went to Courtney. Of course, that meant we had to get new bedding. She is such a girl or I should say young lady. She wanted a lamp that went with the bedding and even brought her own money to buy it. I couldn't make her pay for it even if it wasn't on my list of things to get. Which meant Mason had to get a new lamp. He got a Cars themed lamp that looks like a stop light. Its very cool. All three got clothes hampers. Maybe their dirty clothes can make it into the hamper instead of the floor. Wishful thinking.

My mom fell again. This time in the bathroom. The good news is that she just bruised her tailbone. I told her that if she had a bigger butt like myself, she wouldn't have gotten hurt. My mother has no boobs, no butt, and is thin. Yep, you guessed it, I took after my dad. Big hips, big boobs, big butt. Thank God it all stopped with the big nose. Serious honkers on my dad's side.

Not much else is new. Need to make a hair appointment this week as we leave for Dallas a week from Thursday. Friday I will be picking up the girls' dresses for the wedding. I can't believe its almost here.

Well, I need to get to bed to start my crazy, yet somehow still boring, week. Until next time...

Sleep over

The kids are, or should I say were, on Spring Break this week. It only took 2 days before the bickering, teasing, whining, crying, etc began. So needless to say, I am looking forward to school resuming on Tuesday.

However, on the bright side, my in-laws are keeping the children tonight for a sleep over. Halleluhah!!!!! Scott and I have a night out w/out worrying about coming home by a certain time! Oh, what to do, what to do!!!! So far, we know we are going out for dinner. After that, its anyone's guess at this point. Woo Hoo!!!!

The last couple of nights Courtney and Mason slept on the pullout couch. I promised them we could do this if they kept their rooms cleaned. They worked together on getting their rooms and Makenna's room cleaned. Very proud of them! I tried to sleep w/ them the first night. Boy that pullout is UNCOMFORTABLE!!!! I could feel every spring in the mattress! If I ever invite you to stay with us, you may want to find a hotel instead or get an airmattress. However, the kids loved it! Go figure.

Not much else is new. Still working on getting to St Louis in July. It pretty much looks like a go for me! Woo Hoo! Also, we leave for Dallas in 4 weeks! Can't wait to see my girls in their beautiful dresses.

Got to get some bills paid. Until next time....

Freaking out my husband....

is so much fun. My sister came in town this past week-end to visit. She had cleaned out her closets and brought down all of the clothes she was going to get rid of to me. The clothes filled a large duffle bag which weighed 47lbs (the bag had to be weighed at the check-in counter). She brought me a TON of clothes. I am so loved. I tried everything on after the kids and I went shopping with my sister. I had the clothes in piles on my bed when Scott came home. Ah, my prime time to get him! I met him at the front door and stated my sister is a bad influence on me as he knew we went shopping that day. He asked me what I meant. I told him to look in our room. He saw the clothing covered bed and looked at me in astonishment! "Did you buy all this?????" I told him that I got a really good deal on them and my sister was very convincing that I needed these. WHAT????? Yes, I paid my sister 40 cents for the clothes. I owed her $21.60 for something she got for me and I gave her $22. Scott told me that I was lucky I didn't really buy all those clothes. Otherwise, he would have all new rods and reels!!!! Sucker!!!!! Hee Hee Hee!

Easter was nice. We had our own egg hunt in the house as it rained all day on Saturday. Very wet outside. We then went to a friend's house for a little gathering. It was a very nice and relaxing day.

Not much else is new here. I know I know - how boring her life is, but I will take an occassional boring period to help out with those completely out of control periods of my life!

I know it was a long time since I posted. I will try my best to get out here more often. Until next time....